What is a goal? It is an aim or purpose, quite simply. Something that you desire to attain. More often than not, the goal is often vaguely defined and therein lies one of the issues. How does one aim for something if you’re not clear on what it is you want it for, or don’t know much about it. My life experience is enriched, addled and complemented by misguided aims.

All through my schooling career, everyone in my family knew that my aim was to become a doctor in order to help people. Not just a general practitioner, specifically a cardio-thoracic surgeon. It was a term I had learned during my primary schooling. I read up about it using my trusty World Book Encyclopedias and decided in my infinite wisdom as an 8-year old that that was my calling. At the time, being a doctor was held in exceptionally high esteem amongst the wider family members and my community, thus building up my stature. After All, you had to garner distinctions to gain entrance into med school, which means you had to be ‘clever’.

That aim, nonetheless, fuelled my academic career right into matric, even into early acceptance at medical school. However, at the nth hour, the ‘calling’ sadly ran out of steam and I dropped the bombshell on my parents: I didn’t want to go to med school any longer.

Shock, dismay and fear (for my future) were the primary reactions from my family, but I stood fast. It was my very first taste of becoming clearer on my goals. But the immediate question that burned was, what next?

I shuffled my feet into my second career option, which was to qualify as an actuary. Note, that at this stage, my level of clarity about the profession was vague and was an option that came as a recommendation from my school teacher and a family friend. Good at maths? Check. Distinctions? Check. ‘Go do actuarial science, you will make lots of money’.

So, was I ready to change the world by statistically studying uncertain future events and using financial theory to recommend probable outcomes/solutions? Umm, we were going to find out.

And find out we did in my first year of university, where before the year was up, I knew this was not for me. Oh dear. A year’s worth of study ‘down the drain’. How could this be happening to this little dynamite from a small town who originally had the rest of her life mapped out for her?

I am certain there’s a few nodding of heads and ‘uh-huhs’ going on based on what I have outlined, as it resonates on many levels. Many people that I engage with, whether within a coaching environment or more generally, feel discomfort because they are going with the flow instead of channelling the flow into a particular direction because the can and want to. Many, many years later, through personal development, I came to realise it boils down to PURPOSE. 

It turns out my first year of study was the start of many epiphanies about who I am, what I love, what I dislike and the ‘why’ motivating it. Far from going ‘down the drain’, my setback pushed me to even greater achievements but also more setbacks and failures, leading me to my present. It’s been a thought-provoking journey understanding and living out my purpose.